Co-parenting tips
Has anyone else been in a state where they are finding challenges with co-parenting? This can be one of the most challenging things for parents to do. Living in different homes, having different expectations, boundaries, and values can result in challenges parenting with one another as well as different guidelines for the home. This can lead to large amounts of frustration and resentment when trying to work and parent one's child. If this is you, you are not alone! Co-parenting is a large skill to master. In reality, each parent is doing what they perceive to be best for the child. It can be challenging when or if these values and expectations do not align. Let's look at some tips to assist with co-parenting in a healthy way.
One of the most challenging and important tips for co-parenting is communication. This can be challenging, especially if the relationship between parents is not civil. In reality, the only way to know what is taking place when you are not around is communicating with the other parent what has taken place. This can be smaller such as meals eaten and homework that has been completed or larger such as challenges the child has had with pushing boundaries and limits resulting in discipline. The more open communication takes place, the less likely things are to get twisted when going to and from homes. This can eliminate large amounts of stress and frustration when getting information from a different source.
But what if communication is not healthy between parents? This can be challenging and unfortunately is not uncommon. If this is the case, placing strict boundaries of only talking about the children is the most appropriate route to take. Remember, if you are creating these boundaries it is okay if you enforce them. This can mean not responding when conversations get taken in unhelpful or unproductive ways as well as setting reminders and boundaries for the expectations that are set.
Another tip for co-parenting is having similar expectations and rules/boundaries in each home. Transitioning from home to home can be hard for children. On top of this, having different rules and expectations in each home can cause confusions and frustration for each child involved. The more consistency there is in each home, the easier it will be for all parties involved, This can involve many things such as similar bed times, discipline, household rules, and more.
Co-parenting is extremely challenging. Let's reframe and focus on the reason behind co-parenting (the children) compared to any underlying issues or hurt between parents.
Written by: Jordan Allen
